Tuesday, 17 November 2009

Professor Xavier Is A Jerk!

As mentioned before, many of the current woes in the Marvel Universe are a result of Professor X's misusing of his mutant students. The whole War of Kings thing currently being played out between the Shi'ar and the Inhumans might have been prevented, had Xavier happened to mention to anyone that there was a third Summers brother, one with a bit of a grudge against the Shi'ar. So, what other misdeeds can we accuse the X-Men's mentor of?

1. Whilst still in the womb, killed his own twin.

2. On the US Army's dollar, shagged his way across Europe, leaving at least one pregnant woman in his wake.

3. Used his psychic powers to put the whammy on any woman not taken in by his "charm".

4. Forced one of his students to take a job working at a club where she would regularly be expected to dress in fishnets and bodices.

5. Fancied a bit of peace and quiet from his students, so faked his own death.

6. Sent a group of novice mutants to rescue his original team of X-Men, got them killed, and then never mentioned it to anyone ever again!

7. Went evil.

8. Again.

9. And again.

10. Buggered off into space with his latest girlfriend, leaving his school and students in the hands of their arch-enemy.

11. Wanted his school and students back, so lobotomised the aforementioned arch-enemy.

12. Went evil, again...

13. Outed himself as a mutant, at the same time dropping his students in it.

14. When his ex-girlfriend, Moira McTaggart, was murdered by the mutant terrorist, Mystique, responded by - hiring Mystique to carry out black ops missions for him.

15. Used his experience of faking his own death, to help Magneto fake his own death.

Make no mistake, this man is not a nice guy. If you see him, do not approach. Unless it's to kick his wheelchair over and kick him in his bald head, that is...

(This cheap inventory post previously appeared in my other blog, February 2006.)

1 comment:

Scott said...

I love these panels about Prof. X. These are funny!